Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Flawed Logic: The All-American Sport

I used to say that the "All-American" sport was tossing trash from car windows.  Then I thought it was swallowing spoon-fed philosphy and values (without looking at the spoon).  These are still top-ranked American sports.  But now I rank them at #2 and #3 respectively.  By the way, #4 and #5 are Passing Judgement and Fantasy Football, in that order.

The number 1 All-American Sport is Contradictory Logic.

Acceptable Not Acceptable
Smoking Cigarettes Smoking Marijuana
Drinking Beer, Liquor Drinking Four Loco
Buying Lottery Tickets Poker, Gambling
Voting Gambling
TV: Stabbing, Shooting, Amputation, Gore, Violence TV: Naked boobies
Different Insurance Rates for Men and Women Different Insurance Rates for Healthy vs Fat Smokers
Black History Month White History Month
Spanish Phone Menus Asian Phone Menus
Put Your Dying Dog to Sleep Put Your Dying Grandfather to Sleep
Seat Belts in Cars Seat Belts on Busses and Motorcycles
Pilots License at 14 Drivers License at 14
Driver Lessons Before License Gun Lessons Before License
Driving While Eating, With Dog in Lap, Putting on Make-up Driving with Cell Phone
4x4 Lift-Kit Truck with High-Beams behind you at Traffic Light Rear-facing High Beams
Hardees Thickburger Whole Milk
Invading Other Countries Other Countries Invading Us
Criticizing Foreign Human Rights Violations Foreigners Criticizing Our Human Rights Violations
Saying America is "Number 1" in Everything Admitting America is Only "Number 1" for Obesity
Saying Your Church/Synogogue/Mosque is "Open To All Other Religions" Actually Reading the Scriptures of Other Religions
Watching Dancing With The Stars Dancing
Watching Monday Night Football Playing Football
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