Wednesday, December 21, 2011

I ****ing Hate Microsoft Access

I posted this on my Google+ page, but since I'm sure many of you (ok, most of you) don't ever go there, I'm reposting it here because I'm still pissed off...


Time to Vent...

Microsoft Access is evil. It is the worst God-forsaken piece of shit ever perpetrated on enterprise customers in the history of mankind. It has held up migrations of Office suites in more places than I have days to count. The notion of bundling applications WITH databases is as stupid as riding a bicycle off a cliff. I fucking HATE that application. My teeth are clenched. This is not good. I must continue...

God****it - Access has wasted so much time of so many people's lives that will never be recouped. I can almost forgive IBM for OS/2 Warp, and Autodesk for R13, hell I can even forgive MS-DOS, but I cannot forgive Access. What a fetid turd of technological vacuousness. Is that even a real word? Vacuousness? Whatever. I made it up because thinking about Access pisses me off.

Is there any shortage of reiterated emphasis on "de-coupled" application logic on MSDN? On TechNet? On ANY programming site? Publish a rule and break it. Just as I blogged about with the Configuration Manager AD publishing guideline, but whatever, I need a glass of wine now...

Today makes at least two dozen situations, over the past 12 years, where a customer has to hold up everything because the dipshit department is arguing over upgrading their craphole Access "application" and who will pay for it (you know: "We think YOU should pay because YOU are forcing US to upgrade to 2010" versus "We think YOU should pay because YOU made a stupid garage-app piece of fucking shit mistake that WE are having to pay for in lost time and productivity") Wash - Rinse - and Repeat - AGAIN.

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