Sunday, November 29, 2009

If I were King for a Day

I would…

  • Outlaw bow ties
  • Outlaw showing underwear in public
  • Make it MUCH more difficult and expensive to obtain a drivers license
  • Eliminate Turn Signals and Ash Trays (nobody uses them)
  • Impose a Waiting Period for Movies to produce merchandising
  • Require an equal amount of time in movies between violence and graphic sex
  • No waiting period between a murder conviction and execution
  • Violence against, or exploitation of children would be punished by limb amputation
  • Impose a limit on cop/lawyer shows on TV
  • Impose fines for bad weather forecasts
  • Eliminate SOX
  • Absolve all outstanding mortgages for American’s earning less than $250k
  • Provide 100% college education grants for students maintaining GPA=4+ or anyone serving more than 4 years in the military
  • Impose taxes on companies that outsource jobs overseas
  • I still have 23 hours left to think of more…
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