Saturday, September 5, 2009

More Degraded Driver Douchivity

I drive 64 miles a day on my round-trip commute to/from work. Along the way I've collected some useful information that helps me avoid the asswiped douchebag idiots and their diabolical stupidity behind the wheel. But more importantly, I realized that there are two basic groups of people, and within each are two types:

Nice or Mean
Smart or Stupid

So, you can have Nice+Smart or Mean+Stupid, and so on. Four basic permutations are possible, with only subtle variations within their mixtures.

Statistically, there are more Nice+Stupid than anything else. After that, is Mean+Stupid. Third is Mean+Smart. In last place is Nice+Smart. That's right, it's the rarest of all kinds. Rarer even than RH-negative blood type. Rarer than winning a lottery. It's God's (or someone's) way of reinforcing the basic concept of scarcity-vs-value. If we had our favorite food every night, it would be boring and cheap (by value). But because most of the things we truly value are hard to obtain, they remain desirable. That's why Nice+Smart people are the most charished of all types of people we know.

The worst combination is of course Mean+Stupid, but Mean+Smart can be diabolically bad on occassion (think of most John Malkovich characters).

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